Lunch With The New Kids On The Block… Sleeping Bag!

2 12 2008



Hello, loves! We are back with another exciting D-list interview for your eyes only! This week, I had the chance to grab an exciting lunch with The New Kids On The Block sleeping bag! We discussed his recent comeback, stains, and working with an owner who’s grown. Enjoy!

earbudz: First of all, I just want to thank you for taking the time out of your busy schedule to sit down with me.

NKOTBSB: Oh no problem, it is my pleasure. It’s been great for me to be so busy once again, but I still enjoy taking a few minutes here or there for the little people.

earbudz: Thank you for calling me little!

NKOTBSB: I didn’t mean skinny.

earbudz: Oh. Okay then. So, NKOTB is back on the scene! How has this comeback been for you?

NKOTBSB: Well, to be honest, I don’t really understand what the problem was in the first place. My owner used to sleep in me every single night. We were tight and I thought that nothing would separate us. You see that red stain right there? (points to self with non-existent hands)

earbudz: Yes (gasp) is that blood?

NKOTBSB: No, ass nugget. That’s lipstick! My owner used to kiss me right there on Joey’s face every single night as she listened to, “Please Don’t Go Girl.” Then the music changed, eventually we hit the “Dirty Dawg” listening days and then… well… one day I was suddenly rolled up and stuck in a musty cellar next to some old lady’s corset.

earbudz: Oh that’s awful! I totally hate corsets!

NKOTBSB: Tell me about it. I don’t know how long I was packed away there, but a couple of months ago, the door opened and I was freed! It has been one whirlwind of a crazy time since then! My owner now fills a lot more of me when she sleeps in me, but she just said that it’s because she has some disease called, “old”. Additionally, she now has a boy sometimes join her. I don’t like him. When he sleeps over, I don’t get very much sleep and he has added a new stain to Joey’s face that I’m not very fond of.

earbudz: Mmm, yes I see that. Have you tried Oxy?

NKOTBSB: I’ve tried it all. Well listen, Sweets, it’s been great talking to you but I really have to get going. I’ve got an appointment with the dry cleaners in 15 minutes and it’s all the way uptown.

***NKOTBSB gets up and hastily walks out just as the waitress is arriving with two plates of food***

earbudz: Okay, well thank you! (calling after the sleeping bag) Hey! Can I eat this????

Posted by Garvey



19 10 2008

Welcome one, welcome all to earbudz!  We are OFFICIALLY launched!  Please feel free to peruse the site at your leisure and comment to your little heart’s desire.  You can find some background on us under the “da budz” tab, and we have also posted some back posts for your reading pleasure.  Also, make sure you check out this week’s Mixtape Showdown for some sweet tunes and then vote for your favorite mix!

Your best friends forever, Garvey and Cooper

An Evening With Miley Cyrus… Cup!

19 10 2008


For our first D-list interview, this one is quite the A-lister, folks!  Tonight I had the unique opportunity to sit down for a few moments with (my roommate’s) Miley Cyrus (cup)!  We sat down over a cup ‘o joe (being held by Ms. Miley Cyrus cup herself) and delved into Miley’s work on the new Disney Christmas album, her new boyfriend, and dishwasher safety.  Please enjoy.

earbudz: Miley!  First of all, I want to thank you for taking the time to sit down with us this evening.

MCC:  You pulled me out of the dishwasher mid-cycle, dipshit.

earbudz: And I have to say, this recent wash has made you look all shiny and clean!  How do you ever keep your skin so young looking?

MCC: It’s made out of plastic.

earbudz: Wow!  Not many people in Hollywood admit to having plastic surgery done!  I am truly impressed that you are able to be so honest and forthright!

MCC:  I didn’t have surgery, asshole.  I’m made out of plastic.  I’m all plastic.  I’m a cup, for cry-eye!

earbudz: Well, you are one beautiful cup, that’s all that I know!  So let’s talk about Mr. Justin Gaston!  Now there’s a hunka hunka burnin’ love!  No matter how much older he is, or how illegal it would be for him to have sex with you…

MCC:  Justin Gaston is dating Miley Cyrus.  I’m a cup with pictures of Miley Cyrus all over it.  No one is trying to have sex with me.  Because I’m a cup.  A cup.

earbudz:  But surely you must have some nugget of behind the scenes information for us!

MCC: Do you realize that your roommate bought me for one dollar at Dominick’s?  I’M A CUP!  I was made in Taiwan, sat in a cardboard box, then on a grocery store shelf in Chicago, and then I ended up in your cupboard.  I’ve never even met Miley Cyrus.

earbudz:  Okay, okay, we understand artists wanting to keep their personal lives private.  We’re down with that.  Let’s talk about the new Disney Christmas album that you’re singing on, “All Wrapped Up.”  

MCC:  The coffee that you’ve filled me with is starting to melt me.  What kind of an asshole puts hot coffee in a plastic cup?

earbudz:  Well, we here at earbudz can’t wait to review the album!

MCC:  I’m melting.

earbudz:  We understand that our time is up, but thank you so much for taking the time out of your busy schedule to sit down with us tonight!

MCC:  Meeeeellltttiiinnngg…

Posted by Garvey